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Category Archives: false teaching

Joel Osteen’s “Check Theology” Light!


HOUSTON, TX—An exasperated Joel Osteen threw up his hands while preaching this past Sunday as his pulpit’s “Check Theology” light came on once again.

“Ugh, this is the third time this month—what now!?!” he shouted in a rare outburst. Osteen then suddenly realized that the tens of thousands of people who come to his church for a self-help speech every Sunday were watching him intently. “Oh, uh, heh—I mean, it’s no problem. I, uh, just had that little outburst so you could see what NOT to do.”

“See, you don’t want to let negativity in your life,” he said, regaining his composure as he plastered a fake smile on his face.

After the service, Osteen had a pulpit mechanic in to look at the sleek, stainless steel podium. The mechanic hooked it up to his portable computer. “Ah, here’s your problem, bud,” the worker said. “Looks like you’re preaching the Word-Faith gospel again. See, when you tell people that all they have to do to solve their problems is speak words of positivity, it trips the warning on this model.”

“I recommend repenting of your false gospel right away,” the mechanic said helpfully.

Osteen then thanked the mechanic for his help and paid him to rip the Check Theology light right out of the dash.

 
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Posted by on November 15, 2019 in false teaching

 

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Habits of Holiness: #5- Engaging with Unbelief?

“Sorry, only six months!” “SIX MONTHS TO LIVE, Doc?” “That’s right. Say, you could use some of that time to engage with some unbelievers who are attacking the Christian faith!” “Okay, Doc,” I said, as I left his office with only 180 days left on this earth.

What if I, what if you, had only six months to live? How would your life be different over the next 180 days?

Several holy habits ought to mark each of us if we are followers of Jesus. We must spend time in His Word; we must take prayer much more seriously than we do; we must follow Jesus’ example and be a friend of sinners; and we must look for opportunities to disciple others!

Another holy habit, I would suggest, applies to those who have been believers for a while. There are some strong challenges to the gospel, the reliability of the Bible, and the exclusivity of Jesus. Titus 1:11 says, “They must be silenced, because they are disrupting whole households by teaching things they ought not to teach—and that for the sake of dishonest gain.” False teaching and teachers must be confronted. And Christian leaders need to read books they know will boil their blood before they get past the preface (my definition of a “boiling book”).

Here are some of the books I’ve read that challenge my Christian convictions. I don’t read these books for spiritual nourishment (much of their content is spiritual poison).

Here are a few books by the false teacher Spong:If you’ve been a believer for a few years, you need to read some books that don’t agree with your Christian convictions, especially if some of your unsaved friends are being influenced by them. Faithful readers of this blog know that I did a 22-post review of Michael Thielen’s book What’s the Least I Can Believe and Still Be a Christian?

Here’s an assignment: Ask your unsaved friend what he or she has been reading. Unless it’s a novel, tell them you want to read the same book and discuss it sometime. Then do it!

 

 

 

 

 
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Posted by on April 17, 2019 in false teaching

 

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